Keep playing it…

Tw for discussion of eating disorder stuff

Okay. So I had my med review today and I was trying to figure out why it was so triggering.

Like, why did I promise her something and then go and do the opposite right after lunch?

That’s really not like me.

Here’s the thing: my psych, who was super well intentioned, had no idea what she was saying.

She wanted to send me to bariatrics.

NOT HELPFUL.

I’ve been there. All they do is focus on what foods are “bad.” I’m totally clear on that.

I’ve had tons of nutritional education. I don’t need that.

She obviously thinks it’s a good thing for me to lose weight, which, I mean, I need to, but that is not the messaging I needed today.

When I said I was down to 800 calories a day, she said, “I’ve seen keto diets as little as 500 calories a day.” Like WHAT?! How is that helpful?

I checked her on that right then, but it was still damaging.

I tried to tell her. I did. I tried.

So I mean, THAT is why I think I messed up. I did it. I mean, I purged. That’s on me, but I was def triggered by her and her unhelpful response.

It’s just hard because she’s so NICE.

Really, she’s very sweet and caring.

I just have not had a mental health professional be quite so weird about it.

Whatever.

It just wasn’t helpful today.

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