My conflicted faith…

I mean, here’s the thing. I’m a Christian. I’m not an exceptionally good example of a Christian I guess, but I am one. I don’t live the perfect Christian life. I don’t attend church every Sunday or participate in a bible study. I like the idea of being that kind of Christian. I’ve been closer …

Can’t stay awake…

I swear I think I have mono or something. I’m just exhausted. I’ve been sleeping for days. I’m not really depressed so I can’t blame that. At least, not depressed enough to account for sleeping 16-18 hours a day. I feel terrible. Like I’m going to have to go in for a another stupid covid …

What the heck?

Okay. I am trying to recover from a sinus infection thing. It is not fun. Anyway, the doctor I saw was not my regular doctor so he gave me an antibiotic and can you guess what one of the post marketing adverse reactions listed are? I bet you can! Yes- it’s PANCREATITIS! This doctor gave …

An exploded life…

I have had, admittedly, too much free time because of this stupid pandemic. It’s giving me time to reflect. Generally, I don’t think that’s very good for me. What I’ve realized is that I spent a little over ten years blowing up my life. I was in and out of the hospital something like 13 …

I am zombie…

I feel so blurry this morning. I’m exhausted and I don’t know why. I woke up a zillion times and I haven’t been doing that as much lately. I’ve been having nightmares more though, and that super sucks. (And speaking of nightmares, don’t do a search in the free photo files on wp for “zombie” …

I am a…

... morning person I guess. I think I am actually an anxious person who hates to be late. I mean, I hate it. So... this puts me in conflict with people who are casual about mornings and don’t seem to mind being a little bit late to things if it means they get that last …

I don’t like…

...DBT diary cards. I liked my old mood charts, but the diary cards are kind of like... meh. I guess it’s because they don’t track what’s important to me on them. I’m thinking about redoing them on excel and presenting the alternative ones to my therapist. I will leave most of what the DBT ones …

It’s not COVID…

...at least as far as I know. The doctor thought it was a sinus infection and gave me some antibiotics. I’m pretty sure he’s right, having had multiple sinus infections in my life. I am just feeling pretty rough. I know I’m sick because my mood is off. It really goes off now when I’m …

Don’t wanna move…

Actual photo of me today. I’m just a slug. I got up early, but I went back to bed and slept in. I might sleep some more today. I woke up with a sore throat, but that has gone away so I think it was just from sleeping with the fan on in a dry …

I’m trying not…

...to totally freak out about this inauguration. I just spent a semester up close with people who think like the incoming administration. I can’t. I’m somewhere in the middle, if that’s even possible anymore. I mean, I just don’t understand why we have to hate people just because they don’t agree with us. Why is …