This requires a TW: SUICIDE This is also LONG. I realized I have yet to tell my "diagnosis story" with any kind of detail. Here goes. I think I really started showing symptoms by age 11 or 12. I can remember crying at night with my Mom for no reason. I blamed family members, I … Continue reading Beginning
So I went to the bar. Got a tiny buzz. Then I decided it was dumb. I ate a salad and some frozen fruit whip stuff, (like a sorbet), and came home with my friend. My friend gets extra bonus points for being my designated driver tonight. She rocks. I just hit critical mass with … Continue reading Bar
Here I was entirely freaked out about the food I ate on vacation and how I was gaining weight. Turns out I lost two pounds! I have no idea how I managed to do that, but whatever. Yay! I did do a fair amount of walking on a few of those days, and we were … Continue reading The Good
My cousin and I have been like sisters for a very long time. Her babies are like my nieces, and the oldest one, (3 and a half), I am especially close to. Hugging that little girl goodbye broke something inside of me. I have already Elaborated on why this is so hard for me in … Continue reading Heartbreak
My large goal is to stay "quitted" from smoking. It's been 8 days, but I have some stressful things here and I'm worried about my ability to stay that way. I'm pretty committed to it though, and I have patches so I'm not going to give myself excuses or reasons to slip. I meet with … Continue reading Goals: 4/25
I have to say goodbye to my cousin and her family today. I've already been in tears about it this morning. I'm not sure how I'm going to get through this particular aspect of my day, or really any of the things I need to do leading up to it. I am not good at … Continue reading Goodbyes
Somehow my posts got out of order. I'm not sure how that happened, but I think I managed to revert something to a draft when I was in a hurry. Oh well, it's fixed now. I was sitting in the hospital this evening with a friend who's not feeling very well, (not contagious, but could … Continue reading Order
I am not the biggest fan of Atlanta's airport. It's huge. Delta however, is amazing. I asked for them to change my seat assignment to a window seat because I was assigned to a seat between two people again and they fixed it at the gate. Thank goodness. I have a little claustrophobia and that … Continue reading Hartsfield
My Mom got me this Apple Watch to celebrate 60 pounds down, (well sort of, I am helping to pay for part of it), and I love it for tracking my walks. Today when I got home from the airport I went for a walk and I used the timer to push myself. I came … Continue reading Under
I hate leaving my Dad. I hate that he chooses to live a third of the country away because he doesn't like the weather where I live. I hate that he makes me go through this every time. I miss my life at home too and I have several things this week that I need … Continue reading Torn
My blog has been deliberately void of posts and Vague during the last week because of my time with my Dad. I'm not convinced that he or my stepmother don't read my blog, (despite my preference that they not since my Michigan parents seem to be able to honor my request), and I don't want … Continue reading Deliberate
