This requires a TW: SUICIDE This is also LONG. I realized I have yet to tell my "diagnosis story" with any kind of detail. Here goes. I think I really started showing symptoms by age 11 or 12. I can remember crying at night with my Mom for no reason. I blamed family members, I … Continue reading Beginning



Today is d-day. I have to be at the hospital this afternoon for my hysterectomy. I'm nervous. I have a really good doctor and she assures me everything will be fine. I like the hospital that it's going to be at- they seem to always do right by me and those I care about- and … Continue reading Surgery


Still making this face, but I'm getting things accomplished. Therapy and case management went well this morning. Ran a couple of errands. I have the kitchen started and some clothes in the wash. I paid my bills. I have stuff organized as much as I can think of right now until the laundry is done. … Continue reading Whew!


So many things to take care of today! I have therapy here in a minute, which I am kind of anxious about. I haven't seen her in a couple of weeks and last time didn't go very well. I need to run an errand and then I see my case manager after that. I'm not … Continue reading Day…


...again. Argh! Not like I have anything to do. I don't really want anyone driving on this anyway. There's blowing and drifting snow on top of a layer of ice that is just ridiculous. I'm trying to make my peace with it. I'm trying to give it to a higher power. I suck at that, … Continue reading Closed


...I deal with this level of anxiety by doing things. I generally try to find things to distract myself for a while from whatever is bothering me by going to a movie or shopping or something. I can't do that because I'm trapped in the freaking house by a layer of ice. Now it's snowing. … Continue reading Usually…


As in, everything is encased in a fairly substantial layer of ice. The trees are crackling in the breeze. I already managed to fall on my butt once this morning. My knee has a nice big lump on it- and it's not my good one. I guess it you are going to screw one up... … Continue reading Encased


I am absolutely ridiculous. I might as well set my hair on fire and run around. This weather is killing me. I cannot handle any more snowpocalypse crap. Really. The anxiety involved with the buildup and the news being almost entirely about each storm... ugh. Anxiety is already completely out of control because of surgery … Continue reading ALERT 🚨