Averted

Crisis averted. Mom's Crunch! was no big deal. She'll just be sore for a few days. It's also good to know that the girl who hit them refused medical, so she's probably okay too. Now back to my chores for the day... Sigh. Image from Pexels.

Crunch!

I'm currently sitting in the Emergency Room with my Mom because she and my stepdad were in a car accident this morning. They are doing the usual xrays and ct scans to make sure that she's okay since she's complaining of pain. Hopefully, everything is alright, and we all suspect that it is, but we …

Echoes

I started hearing "echoes" of what my friend was saying last night. It was like she was repeating one or two words of things she had already said. It kind of freaked me out. I think this is some kind of depression related psychosis and it's very similar to the kinds of "voices" I get …

Weighty

I have gained 60 lbs back out of the 100 lbs I lost since last summer. I know I didn't lose weight in a healthy way last summer, but I'm really struggling with the weight I'm at. I don't know where the balance is. I don't know how to eat healthy and not over do …

Only…

...in Michigan. I swear. This was over the weekend. It's now raining buckets. It's supposed to be dark and gloomy and raining for days. The upshot is that it's supposed to be a balmy 70°F this weekend, so that's almost beach weather. I'm pretty sure the lakeshore will be a busy place actually if it …

Screening

Sitting at the doctor's office and I had to fill out one of those depression screenings. I'm really hoping my doctor doesn't flip out since I was honest. He doesn't seem like the type to. I wrote all over it that I wasn't suicidal, (which is essentially true), and that I see my psych on …

Driving

When I'm not doing well, I start to develop a fear of driving. I have to drive to the next town over to see my rheumatologist this morning and I'm super anxious. I even thought about canceling, but my knee has been ridiculous so I really need to go. It just happened to work out …

Speechless

I wanted to post today, but I don't know what to post about. Does anyone really want to read about another day of oppressive depression that won't abate? I want to crawl out of my skin and hide and scream and run and sleep and disappear all at the same time. I'm scared of myself. …

Everything…

When everything feels like it's falling apart, what do you do? I'm not sure. Really. I don't really have any good answers for anything right now. I just want to curl into a ball and hide. All I can do is cry. I'm so tired of that. It's nearly cloudless today, but the wind is …

Adjustment?

I'm thinking it's time to not only adjust my meds, but actually tinker with them some. It's a scary proposition because I usually have such dramatic reactions to new medications and I never know exactly what those are going to be. I am tired of feeling sad and anxious though. My case manager and I …