Backwards.

Just an update from Michigan: Even though we're allegedly "one of the best states for coronavirus in the country" based on what our governor says- allegedly because of her threatening all of us with jail time- she just announced she is closing our bars. I mean... I don't really drink, but I like to have … Continue reading Backwards.

Day 71

It's everywhere now. The rioting is happening everywhere. I don't know what the answer to this is, but I know destroying your hometown is not it. I am scared and angry. I don't know what these people think they are achieving, but I suspect it is going to be the opposite of what they want. … Continue reading Day 71

Joy.

It's just the kind of day to sit in the backyard with my friend's dog and blow bubbles. It's so pretty! I'm not manic, but I am simply happy. Its been honestly a really long time since I've been able to pinpoint "joy." Sure, there are things that are bothersome to me, and everything is … Continue reading Joy.

Duke.

"My recovery has been an evolution, not a sudden miracle" -Patty Duke I love this because it reminds me to take care of myself and also that it's okay if every day isn't perfect. I had plans to clean and shower today and I don't know if either is going to happen, but it's okay. … Continue reading Duke.

Therapists.

I've had nightmare experiences with therapists over the years. I had a newbie one tell me that I was "too mentally ill" for her to take on. I had one tell me that I was "beyond her level of care" after I pissed off her friend, (in a super long and ridiculous story). I had … Continue reading Therapists.

Day 45

I don't know. Just am. I'm been exhausted for several days now. To the point that I'm sleeping during the day for hours at a stretch. I never sleep during the day. I have weird things going wrong with myself like my eye getting scratched and my arm and hand swelling up. I'm freaking TRAPPED … Continue reading Day 45

Day 40

I dreamt of my grandma last night. I miss her. At the same time, it would be terrible if she were here isolated during this pandemic. It's bad enough that my grandpa is. He has someone that comes every day to help him so his routine isn't changed much, but I miss being able to … Continue reading Day 40

Day 38

Banana bread is in the oven! I used my mom's recipe from the 60's. It's kind of complicated, but it makes really good bread, (if I don't burn it). I am pretty excited about it. I still haven't gotten into the shower, but that's definitely happening today. I have to meet with my therapist today. … Continue reading Day 38

Day 36

There's a bright blue sky this morning. I'm trying to embrace the beauty of it. At least it's not raining... yet. I can see the clouds off to the west so I don't think the blue is going to last for too long. I didn't shower yesterday, so I really have to today. I need … Continue reading Day 36