Scared

If you are the kind of person who prays, I would really appreciate some for tomorrow. If you are not, I am content with warm wishes and good feels sent my way. I am having a medical thing done tomorrow that requires anesthesia for a while and that's always scary. It's essentially a minor surgery …

Goals: 1/31

I need to get this neurology appointment done. I am meeting with an old friend type person. I am getting the heck home and returning this rental car. I need to change the sheets on my bed and put the last little bit of laundry away. I kind of slept like crap last night so …

Stress!

The next two days are like a mini Conveyor belt of stress and anxiety in my life. I made it to the town where my out-of- town neurology appointment is today, but it was nerve racking with the high winds and all of the traffic. I used to make this drive all of the time, …

Dreaming

I have been having some of the strangest and sometimes the scariest dreams again. I can only assume it's anxiety related because there's no other explanation right now. There's no new medication, no new other things, so it has to be anxiety. Sometimes I'm a direct person in the dream and sometimes I am this …

Anxious

Well, I got a nap and my Irritability just dropped back down to anxiety again. Yay. Really I hate being irritable and so whatever, but anxious is no real picnic either. I'm anxious about having to drive tomorrow early in potential snow bands. I am anxious about this procedure thing on Thursday that requires anesthesia …

Late

I woke up late and apparently on the wrong side of the bed. I kind of have a headache, which honestly waking up as late as I did should have warned me about. I have been interrogated about appointments I've had that I'd rather just keep to myself by my mom. I'm working with my …

Goals: 1/30

This will be short because I'm running short on time this morning. I have an appointment soon and then I have to finish my laundry situation. I also have to grab a rental car so I can get to my out of town appointment because my car will not make the trip and I need …

20’s

I look back at my time in college (which for me was most of my 20's), and I realize how functional and dysfunctional those years were. I operated on a frenetic pace much of the time, largely because I spent huge swaths of that decade in some form of hypomania or mania, but I still …

Messages

Apparently this quote is following me around this week. It's been thematic. It started with the art class and me being terrified to go and going and being glad I did. I went to the game night at church not really knowing what to expect, but had a great time. I went to church again …

Goals update: 1/29

I managed to do every load of laundry except for the sheet I do my art on. I will have time to throw that in tomorrow. I also got all of it put away except for one load of clothes and some sheets (and those never really get "put away"). I made my phone calls, …