Elusive

I’m here. Awake. At almost one o’clock in the morning. Yay. I am not excited about it. I’m really anxious about my appointment with my gastroenterologist in the morning. It’s a virtual appointment, but it’s still an appointment and I don’t know what he’s going to say about me having been in the hospital so …

Win!

I’m kind of happy today. I went and got labs done and I was nervous because my gastroenterologist ordered an A1C test to check and see if I was starting to develop diabetes because of all of my pancreatic issues. Good news! I’m not! I was worried. I put it off until the last possible …

Boogeymen

What fears have you overcome and how? This is a picture I posted on my blog back in 2017. It shows where someone dig into the window casement and pried the window open. I was sooo freaked out (they ran away when I came back into the room). Anyway, I had been afraid of people …

I think it’s getting to me…

It’s been sunny and dry here for a month. We haven’t had rain since May 7. I am starting to feel…a little itchy. I don’t know. I just don’t like the blasting sun for days on end. I’m sure that’s some peoples’ dream. Sunny days that never end… Not me. Give me some clouds and …

Need to find my motivation…

My motivation seems to be about as lacking as the rain has been over the past couple weeks. I guess part of it is that I don’t feel 100% and also that it is, as I’ve said, so darn hot. Just sizzling out there. It just sucks my energy dry as soon as I step …

Giving up fear…

Choosing to clean may look like an weird way to express giving up fear, but hear me out. My bedroom has been a disaster area for a year. At least. For that year, I have been in and out of the hospital more times than I can count with pancreatitis. It’s gotten so bad that …

Over this

Don’t get me wrong, my hospital room has this gorgeous view, but I’m done being here. I’m pretty sure I’m being discharged today, which is fine by me, I just want to go already. I do not know why I am still sitting here. The doctor I’ve had for the last two days was a …

Sardines

I absolutely do not want to sound ungrateful, because I am just grateful to not have to be taking care of these symptoms by myself anymore, but this unit that they have me in is like packing people in sardine cans. My room is maybe 8x8, has no windows, and a shared bathroom with the …

Stuck

I ate some spaghetti last night for dinner. Not very much, and it was mostly noodles and sauce. Anyway, I was nauseated all night long and just felt terrible. It was the first time I deviated from my “bananas, toast, jello and cereal” diet in several days. I guess my stomach wasn’t ready. I ate …

Woo hoo!

Yay for self care! I got in the shower and I shaved my legs! If you don’t do that, let me tell you what happens when you don’t keep up on that even a little bit. It becomes a huge chore. Like an extra twenty minutes in the shower kind of chore. I thought I …