My mood is trash

I am grouchy and tired and restless and depressed. I chalk it up to being on painkillers for a week while I was in the hospital and the few days before. I feel miserable. They totally mess up my mood. I need to do some basic things, and some not so basic things, to take …

Crazy, sick or both?

I finally got out of the hospital on Sunday. I still feel not so good. I’m just really tired now and my legs are inexplicably like lead and jelly at the same time. I actually didn’t notice that in the hospital when I was walking around my room. Now I notice it. I don’t know. …

Not ready for this week

I have so many things I need to do this week. Tomorrow I need to try to schedule a dentist appointment again. It’s so hard to get into my dentist. It’s stupid. I just have to keep trying though. I have to schedule a medical test. I have to schedule an oil change for my …

Saturday Movies…

I’ve been pretty lazy today. I went to breakfast with a friend I haven’t seen in a long time. I watched the 1982 version of Annie, (which is pretty much my favorite movie to this day). I visited my cousin and her girls. I watched a Clint Eastwood flick. Now I’m watching Mean Girls. It …

Tomorrow decides my fall

I have this graduate school interview tomorrow and the outcome of it will decide how my fall goes. I am supposed to find out in 1-2 weeks whether I am accepted or not, so I’m grateful that I am not going to be in limbo for a long time. It does sort of determine what …

New meds and trying

My psych added a new antidepressant to my cocktail of meds yesterday. I am hopeful that the med will help lift me up out of the constant state of low level depression I seem to be in. It’s kind of like I’m under water but I can see the surface and just can’t break through. …

Mental health appointments!

I see both my psych and my therapist today. I am kind of in an in-between place. I think my meds are more or less okay. I mean, could they be better? Maybe. I don’t really know. I am always just kind of depressed. I wish I could just not be there. I wish I …

I like sleep.

I am tired and worn out again and I am so grateful to be back in my bed. Seriously. I love sleep. It’s funny because at different times in my life, I’ve hated sleep, or rather, the necessity of it. Now I am so happy to get rest, and enough of it, it’s almost silly. …

Welp, two loads done…

I got two loads of laundry done. They don’t look like the above picture, however. At least I have some clean clothes for the next two days. I can get the rest of it done sometime this weekend I guess. Along with the trash and organizing things… I have so much to do. I just …

Trying to stay positive…

I am kind of in an in-between place. My life is okay. I mean, it’s not great as of now, but it has the potential to be. It’s not terrible, but it has the potential to be. The terrible though, I mean, it’s not up to me. It’s all in other people’s hands. It’s very …