I am scared

I may have been exposed to Covid and I feel a little funky. I’m scared that I might be coming down with it. I scheduled a test for five days from exposure, but I am worried. I don’t want to get anyone in my house sick, and I’m scared to tell them I might have …

My closet is a mess!

After I replaced the lightbulbs, I decided to start tackling the shelves in my closet. I literally organized one and half shelf and got overwhelmed. I mean, it’s a start, and I’m not sad about it, but it’s ridiculous. I threw out half a bag of trash just from those two shelves. I even found …

BANNED

For real my mom just banned me from seeing my ex. I’m 42 years old. I’m pretty sure I can set my own damn boundaries. Whatever. I’m am just angry. I don’t know why she can’t let me live my life. This is so annoying. This is the second time this week she has told …

What I wouldn’t give…

…for an opportunity to smoke a cigarette right now. For real. I just really want to. I have been pretty good about not smoking. I vape, but I have been pretty good about cigarettes. I don’t know why I’m craving one so badly right now except for my mood state. Ugh. Stupid hypomania. Anyway. That’s …

Bang! Bang! Bang!

There is no refuge in my house from the sound of my stepdad working on the deck. It is so loud. I am getting another migraine and would really like to take a nap. No dice. I am getting frustrated. I know he loves his projects, so I’m trying to be supportive. I’m just tired …

Someone bring me coffee!

My Princess Leia mug is empty and I have no coffee. I’m so sad. Granted, she is mainly used for tea and I generally use different mugs for coffee, but the point remains. I need caffeine. My stepdad gets irritated when I mess with his coffee pot, mostly because I can never remember how much …

I hate being vulnerable

I finally caved and told my mom that I might end up in the hospital because my therapist and dietican are worried. I did not get into specifics of what was going on, but I did tell her. Man, I hate doing that. I usually just keep things to myself. I don’t like upsetting her …

Ugh…

Trigger warning ⚠️ eating disorder ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ My parents are making a big steak dinner on the grill for Memorial Day. I am not excited. Not only do I feel awful, but I am not enthusiastic about eating it just on a eating disorder basis. I mean, it will be a relatively healthy meal with fresh …

My psych appointment

No, the rooms don’t really look like this. Anyway, my psych decided that my issues are “therapy” issues and decided not to change my meds. I guess I don’t know how I feel about that. She also suggested that maybe I need to change my living arrangements. I about had a heart attack. Like, I …

Talking with my mom

I adore my mom. I have to say that first. The thing is, I don’t talk about “things” with her because she doesn’t get it. She wants to know what I’ve been talking about in therapy and first, I feel like trying to explain that to her would go over her head, and second, she …