Missing people

There are just some people who come into my life and leave such a lasting and indelible mark that I will never forget them. Sometimes, even when things are going well, I really miss them. I miss the conversations and the camaraderie. I miss the way their light shines and the way I feel when …

Awake early!

I am up early because I have a therapy appointment first thing this morning. I tried to get myself into the shower this morning, (I carried my clothes into the bathroom and everything), but I just couldn’t do it. I am so tired. I had plenty of caffeine this morning, but I couldn’t get myself …

Unmotivated today

I was going to get stuff done today, I swear. I planned on it, but the day just took a left turn. I know it’s because I was up too late last night. I slept until two in the afternoon today and then I didn’t feel like doing anything. Ugh. I tried to pump caffeine …

Dichotomy

I am living in a weird split place. I am all at once completely stressed about my room and how messy it is and the work that is going to be involved to get it back to a livable state, and also able to shut that off and hang with friends at the same time. …

Something good in therapy…

I had a really good session with my therapist today. Maybe it was just that I hadn’t seen her in what felt like forever. I’m not sure. It just seemed like it was really productive. We talked about how I felt really invalidated by my medical teams and how much that sucked. We talked about …

Stability is fragile

I realized that part of the reason I’m so upset about my friend getting evicted, besides the obvious, is that I’m not in the most stable of situations myself. I mean, so if something happens to my parents, I am essentially homeless. Not a good feeling. So yeah. I think I might start putting my …

Not packing.

I have at least done some laundry towards packing for this trip this weekend, but I am not actually placing things in a bag like I should be. It’s kind of ridiculous. I have no time on Friday to accomplish this task, so I pretty much have to get it done today and tomorrow. You’d …

Not numb, just scared

I have no idea what I want to be when I “grow up.” I’m having a mid life crisis. I just feel lost. I thought I wanted to be a social worker or counselor, but I think that is too close to home or just something that I couldn’t do well so I don’t think …

Laundry day!

Woo-hoo! It’s my favorite day! Just kidding. I’m washing stuff so I can go up north this weekend to my cousin’s grandma’s 90th birthday party. Mostly, I’m going because my cousin’s husband is staying behind to take care of the puppy, (and I think he doesn’t want to go), and my cousin needs another adult …

Funk.

I woke up today with a headache that I’m hoping is from the weather. We have sort of an unsettled weather pattern with storms last night and more storms forecasted for tonight. I had a lot of fun with my cousin and her girls at the fireworks last night though. They were really nice. It …