Self sabotage…

…is kind of what I’ve been engaged in. I have this fear of success.

I mean don’t get me wrong, I also have an absolutely terrible fear of failure, but I’ve been there before.

It’s “comfy.”

I haven’t had a ton of success as of late.

I am afraid of what happens when/if things work out. What if, things turn out okay and then the bottom falls out of that? I don’t think I could handle that at all. If I fail now, I’m just in the same place I am now. There’s a little further to fall, but not much.

I am scared.

So really, it’s not success. It’s just more failure I am afraid of.

Failure on a bigger scale.

I don’t know. I am just terrified.

Image from Pexels.

2 thoughts on “Self sabotage…

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