It was a nice day and a half, but I have to go back home today.
I emailed some people at my school. We’ll see what kind of reaction I get.
I told them there was a medical emergency. It isn’t like that isn’t true.
I am freaking out.
I have decided I have to shower this morning before I leave because I frankly stink.
I am essentially, other than my shirt, wearing the same clothes I was wearing when I came up here.
I’m trying, but I’m kind of failing.
I really don’t want to deal with my disgusting bathroom or my messy room or my life to be honest.
I might need to ask a friend to help me fix those things.
I am just totally overwhelmed. By everything.
I almost feel like I am going to throw up.
Anxiety has me frozen. I know I can get in the car and make it home, I mean because I have to.
Mostly because I don’t want to be homeless and I want to go to therapy tomorrow even though I know that is going to be hard and full of difficult questions.
It’s probably good I have therapy tomorrow, even though it will be difficult. I’m not sure I wouldn’t have tried to find another place to stay up north if it weren’t for that.
I really don’t want to go back home. I’m putting it off as long as possible this morning.
The weather there is sketchy anyway this morning, so if I leave later, I might miss some of it.
That’s what I’m telling myself anyway.
I’ll make it. It just is what it is.
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