Already crying

Stupid funerals.

The visitation was okay until the end. I was not okay at the end. I just wanted to leave.

Today is the funeral mass.

And burial.

I am already in tears.

I’m supposed to be a pallbearer. I don’t want to be a pallbearer.

Like seriously.

It’s a zillion degrees.

I am already wearing this hot dress. Bad choice when I bought it apparently, but who knew it was going to be scorching today? Seriously?

So yeah.

I feel all kinds of crazy.

I didn’t get enough sleep.

My friend was off the chain delusional last night and I was upset trying to help.

I was then awake until way too late. I was also stressing about today.

I’m worried about me and the heat. I’m worried about falling apart. I’m worried about my family not being stupid. I’m just worried.

Ugh.

I hate this.