Disappointing.

~ k

It’s so hard for me to disappoint people.

I spend untold amounts of energy working on being a “people pleaser” and just trying to keep things on an even keel.

I am so freaking worried about having to tell my therapist that I am switching over to DBT. I know she is going to be blindsided because I haven’t talked to her about it before. I don’t really have time to introduce the idea and that would make it a lie anyway since I’m going to do it.

For those that don’t know, in DBT you switch to their therapist for the length of the program, (and then you can switch back to your old one if you want), so she will know this means she is “losing” me as a client. I hate terminating relationships with providers.

I super hate having to tell her this. Like a lot. She’s very nice. She’s actually beyond nice. It’s just that I need something VERY structured right now and she can’t possibly do that. DBT is run by a team of people and she is not a team.

Ugh. I feel sick about having to talk to her.

I don’t know.

I’ll feel better when it’s done I guess.

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Published by k

10 thoughts on “Disappointing.”

  1. That can be difficult. Two years ago, my therapist suggested DBT for me. But I didn’t qualify (I was going to a clinic not a private practice) I can understand your concern, Maybe ask her if you can come back to her if the DBT doesn’t work out. Explain that you think you need this right now and let her know its nothing personal. she will understand if she is a good therapist.

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  2. Totally agree with Iggy! Especially if she is a nice person at heart, she will only want what is best for you, regardless of her losing you as a client. Once you tell her what’s going on, like you said, you should feel better. Good luck! You will be okay!

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      1. If she doesn’t support your decision, then try not to own her opinion. It’s her opinion only, and unfortunately it’s not up to you or I how she feels about it. You can however, control how you react to her opinion. That’s all you can do! Try not to be so hard on yourself. Don’t worry, I’m guilty of it too, so I relate and am kind of talking to myself here too! LOL!

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  3. You are equally as awesome and I relate to a lot of what you post. Anxiety causes a sick feeling for me as well. Deep in my stomach! UGH!!! My therapist tells me to try not to project and predict the future. We always make up scenarios in our heads, and most times, it doesn’t even happen the way we predict it will. It’s always 10x worse in our minds. She tells me to let things happen in the moment, because it’s a waste of energy to make up what will happen in our minds, and is the source of a lot of internal anxiety. It’s a bad habit, one that we both need to work on it sounds like. Keep us posted, as I would like to know what transpires.

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    1. I definitely project into the future. I have also been told that I need to stop doing that lol. It would be great if I was better at staying in the moment.

      I will definitely keep my blog updated with how things go.

      Thanks!

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    1. It was alright. I mean, she just sort of dropped me right then and didn’t have our last session, but it was okay. I knew we were ending and it was my decision.

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