Locked

I’m frozen in place. I’ve been laying on my bed since I got home 2 hours ago.

I’m still wearing my coat.

I can’t seem to move from this spot.

I’m pretty sure it’s just a fantastic combination of anxiety and depression, but I’m not really feeling up to anything at all. My head kind of hurts and I just can’t.

I think I’ve hit my wall of running in circles trying to outrun this depression. I don’t even know how I am going to make it to church tomorrow at this point. I have to go to church. Like I have to. I will be so sad if I don’t, but I don’t know how I’m getting off of this bed yet.

It’s not like I’m going to sleep the day away or anything. I wish I could do that. I’m not that lucky. I’m just kind of here. No tv. No computer, (this is from mobile). No books. Just me and my pillows.

It’s so bad that I can’t muster the willpower to take a walk today. It would have to be on the treadmill because it is so cold and windy and I just can’t.

Oh well. It’s already 5. I’ll get to call it a day soon enough.

Image from Pixabay.

7 thoughts on “Locked

  1. “like” seems an inaccurate response here. Sorry its so hard. Wiggle your toes, then breathe into them, too. Fingers next, then your nose (it rhymed, and maybe your can wiggle your nose, some can) Stick out your tongue, give your phone the finger. bend your knees, and remember to breathe. Roll over, and back. Drink some water. You will get better. And its hard. Both are true.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Tomorow is a different day. Maybe it will be better in the morning, you know? My moods are all over the place and sometimes I dread doing something and later think…eh, it’s ok.
    Try not to think to far. Depression sucks so bad.

    Also, I’m going with Kiki now 🙂 Adorbs. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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