Sometimes I feel like my mood state never actually hits “normal.” In fairness that may be because I can’t identify what that is, but I also think that’s because a lot of the time my brain is just incubating the next mood state.
I wrote about this last night in Hiding, but right now I feel like my depression is a snake in the grass waiting to strike at any moment. I’m trying to outrun it, but I’m frankly exhausted.
My brain is just sort of harboring this creature until I am too weak to fight it off. It’s such an unsettling feeling.
It actually leads to one of almost frenetic desperation to stay busy and occupied and on the go so that I don’t have any downtime. So far, that’s working, but like today, I have fewer things to do. It has me worried.
I’m sure I’ll survive. It might even be good for me.
Inspired by today’s Daily Prompt: Incubate
Image cited somewhere else on my blog.