Coaster

I have a love/hate relationship with bipolar disorder. It’s obvious why I would hate it. Why would I love it?

I mean, aside from the extremely rare heights of euphoria that I get to climb to, there’s something to be said for the variability in life.

I say that as a person who hates change. Most of me would prefer that things stay Constant and boring. There is this small adventurous side of me though that gets tired of monotony and enjoys a little change every now and then. It keeps life spicy.

Bipolar Disorder is so much more than “happy” and “sad.” There can be combinations of the two and irritability, not sleeping or sleeping too much, psychosis, any number of co-occurring conditions that complicate things, etc. All of these things can come in any number of combination at any time to sort of surprise me and change things up.

It requires that I learn acceptance, (still working on it), and that I be in tune with myself, (probably am hyper-vigilant at this point). I’ve learned so much about myself through this process and I’ve also learned compassion for others in ways that I know I wouldn’t have had if I hadn’t had lived this experience.

My life is so much richer because I live with a mental illness. Harder, more complicated, more frustrating, sometimes more restrictive, and often heartbreaking, but I also find moments of personal inspiration, hope, creativity, compassion, empathy, and human connection through living with this illness as well.

Image from Pixabay

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9 thoughts on “Coaster

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